My mom has been trying to text me in Spanish.

“Are you eating con ustidos tonight?”

Ustidos isn’t even a word.

“Bien amigo, cuando yo casa?”

Literal translation: Good friend, when I house?

What she meant: When do you come home?

“Es tu comido con parental units?”

Literal: Is your food with parental units?

What she meant: Are you eating with us?

“Donde esta mi casa?”

Literal: Where is my house?

What she meant: Are you at home?

Mama, espero que nunca vas a Mexico sola.

Hello.